I’m starting to feel silly about that last protected post. Sarah was probably the only one who read it but…hahaha. I can’t believe I went through with it. It was a birthday gift that was also sort of a dare.

Anyway, I started writing this entry two days ago (before the protected post) but ended up rewriting it a couple of times. I figured no one wanted to hear about how sad I’ve been feeling lately. LOL. Besides, it comes and goes. If you ask me how I’m feeling right now, I’d still say I’m happy. I have Jim to thank for that.

A friend of mine shared something with me a few weeks ago — stuff about breaking up, letting go and moving on. I thought I’d blog about it because Jim told me something yesterday that reminded me of it — mind you, this is unrelated and is actually about someone my friend and I knew in college, let’s call her Kate (because I don’t have any friends named Kate).

It’s like what they always say, “you don’t know what you have until it’s gone.” And then comes regret. The what if’s and if only’s. No matter what people say, we all spend at least some time holding on, hoping the other person would come back sooner or later. Sometimes they do but most of the time, they find someone else.

Kate went after her ex (let’s call him Bono — I’m listening to U2 right now. LOL) for the longest time, trying to convince him to come back to her even though he’d found someone else and was pretty happy. She was convinced that she’d never find anyone like him, who’d love her as much as he did (she was probably right about that — Bono was one of the good guys and believe me, where we were at that point in our lives, he was a real catch). When they finally got back together, Kate started to remember all the things that made her want to leave him in the first place. She started to pick fights and Bono didn’t know what to do. He ended up getting hurt again.

I told my friend, “I think Kate just didn’t want Bono to find someone else.” But she’d never admit it to anyone, not even to herself. Or maybe she just didn’t realize it. Deep down, she might have been thinking, “If I can’t have you, no one else will.” haha. Beh would definitely agree with me. I think we’ve talked about this before.

— If you’ve been Bono at least once in your life:
“Find someone who knows what he/she has when he/she’s with you.” Please don’t take it literally. If the person is one of those “out of sight, out of mind” types, don’t waste your time.

— If you’ve been Kate at least once in your life:
LET GO!!! There’s a reason why ex’s are ex’s.

READ THIS.

Pfft. I’m still having trouble sleeping. I usually go to bed around 10 or 11 (unless I have a movie marathon with my family) but now if I sleep around that time, I wake up by midnight and can’t go back to sleep. I think it might be because usually at this time of year, I’d be really busy — becoming accustomed to getting little to almost no sleep because projects would be piling up.

I’m trying to get my blog ready for a redesign — but who knows when that’s actually going to happen? I haven’t felt like working on anything art-related for a while. Not that I’m uninspired. It’s just that I don’t really have the time to sit down and design something. AND I’ve been having problems with my laptop. The easiest way to fix it would probably be to reformat my hard drive but then I’d have to back up all of my data, do the actual reformatting, reinstall Windows and all the other software I use. Oh, it’s just not worth the time and effort it would take right now.

Seriously, I’d rather sleep.